The Lighter Pack

Have you ever yelled at God? 

Like, shake-a-fist-in-the-air, scream-on-top-of-your-voice, whilst tears-fall-down-your-cheeks kind of yell? 

I have, and it wasn’t pretty. I’m sure some neighbors of ours were thinking of calling the 911 line for a domestic disturbance (you know, the cattle and goats next door?). 

Though it wasn’t pretty, it was much needed. My yells and my screams turned to weeping as I fell down on my knees. I wept for the joy that was missing from my heart. I cried for the peace that had vanquished from my mind. I wept for my longings, impossible dreams, and passions that my husband and I couldn’t pursue. I wept for a loss. Most of all, I wept for God to fill my entire being and make it all go away. To make everything right again. 

Do you know what’s crazy cool about our God? He can take it. He can take our beatings and yelling and screaming and spitting and raging bursts of anger. He can take us exploding all over Him. He can take our “Why God?” and “You promised!” and “I am so angry at you!” and “Don’t you see me, God? Don’t you love me?” Even though not one thing we scream at God comes as a surprise to Him, He still comes down to our level and loves us in our hurt and our pain. He weeps with us. 

I recall reading a passage in Psalms of a time that David was exploding all over the Lord (Psalms is actually full of David regurgitating all over God, sorry for that slightly gross image). It wasn’t pretty and it sure wasn’t something he’d want his mama to witness, but it happened, and it was human. In all of his depressive recounting and mournful anguished cries, he says, “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God. My soul is downcast within me; therefore I will remember You…(Psalm 42:5-6).” 

Dear soul, why are you so downcast? Lay all of your sorrow, heartache, grief, anguish, despondency, fear, and hopelessness down at the Father’s feet. He can take it. Not only that, He WANTS to take it—off your weary shoulders.  

“Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” (Matthew‬ ‭11:28-30‬ ‭NLT‬‬)

What an awesome gift and blessing this is to not have to carry the heavy burdens that life often gives us—and often without our permission, may I add. We have Someone we can hand our heavy pack to! All those heavy books you’re carrying that tell you how to act and what to do to get in God’s good graces (you know, those heavy RELIGIOUS books?)—plop, here ya go, Jesus. That looking-glass mirror that shines all your insecurities, you don’t need that anymore, you are already so fearfully and wonderfully made (see Psalm 139 for the full passage of how awesome you are!). Those metal chains that your so-called friend gave you that his friend gave him that he got from a hole-in-the-wall shop (with the really creepy posters) advertising that it would bring him success, popularity, power, and approval? God’s got the key to unlock you from those chains! And dear mother, that picture frame you’ve been carrying of your late daughter, the one that brings you so much guilt, shame, sorrow, and grief? You can hand it over to the Father, because He’s taking great care of her right now, and He longs to take care of you too.

Everything you hand over to the Lord, He wants to replace it with something lighter: HIS LOVE. Joy. Laughter. Hope. Peace. Security. Rest. Confidence. Goodness. Blessing. Freedom.

So, dear one, explode on. Don’t hold back. Jesus is waiting, and He’s got a much lighter pack ready for you.